Andrew Shaffer

If you haven’t heard of this talented author yet, then you might be living under a rock.  And as always, we’ve made it our mission to point these things out to you and introduce you to authors and books that you just HAVE to read!  We are very excited to have here today author Andrew Shaffer, who just recently released Fifty Shames of Earl Grey, a parody of the popular Fifty Shades.  And as if that wasn’t enough, he even let us email Mr. Earl Grey!  They both took time from their busy schedules and here’s what they had to say.

First things first, let’s get to know you better! Who is Andrew Shaffer? Tell us 5 interesting things about yourself that readers wouldn’t know!

1.  I was named after Andy Griffith.
2. I used to have my tongue pierced. I had a little skull stud with red ruby eyes. It was cool until one day I swallowed it!
3. My first job was working at a library. I was a terrible employee, because all I did was read on the job. I would hide in the restroom with books for hours. I told my boss I had irritable bowel syndrome.
4. I have had four concussions. Or is it five? Too many.
5. My first pet was a tarantula named Cthulu.

Why did you decide to write a parody on this particular title?

I thought “Fifty Shades of Grey” brought up a lot of different issues and, as a critic or reviewer, it was nearly impossible to address them all in a single review or blog post. The parody addresses the questions raised about fan fiction, the response from media (including Dr. Drew), and the way E. L. James seemed to treat BDSM as something in need of curing.

If you could write a parody for another book, which book would it be and why?

I told my girlfriend, Tiffany Reisz, that I’m going to write a parody of her “The Original Sinners” series. Instead of being set in a BDSM club, it would be set in a gym and be called “The Original Spinners.”

You thanked Stephenie Meyer in your Acknowledgements. What would you do if you met Ms. Meyer is person?

Have an off-the-record discussion about “Fifty Shades of Grey.”

We heard that Tiffany Reisz was your beta reader! Here’s your chance to spill the secrets. Got any dirt on Tiffany? 

Truthfully…it would be impossible for me to spill dirt on her! Her Twitter feed (@tiffanyreisz) is 100% her: what you see is what you get.

What scene in FIFTY SHAMES OF EARL GREY was your favorite to write? Care to give us a little teaser?

I had a lot of fun writing the deflowering scene:

Earl Grey rises above me, towering over my naked, quivering woman-flesh. I can’t believe this is happening—it’s too much like a wet dream about Robert Pattinson to be real.
“Are you ready for my love gun?” he says.
Uh-oh. “What’s a love gun? Is that a sex toy?”
“No,” he says. “I’m talking about my penis.”
“Oh,” I say. “Then yes. Fire away.”

Can you tell us when to expect FIFTY SHAMES IS SPACE?

No. But I’m sure it will be out before the final book in George R. R. Martin’s “Fire and Ice” series.

Quick-fire questions!

Beach or mountain? Mountain.
Sunrise or sunset? Sunset. I don’t remember the last sunrise I saw.
Vampires or werewolves? Neither.
Christian Grey or Edward Cullen? Edward, because he came first.*

*That’s what she said.

And last. Can you share a Drink Recipe to our followers? With or without alcohol is fine.

Recipe for Earl Grey tea: 1. Heat water. 2. Steep tea for 1-2 minutes. 3. Enjoy.

Up Close and Personal with Mr. Earl Grey himself!

From: Earl Grey
Date: July 19, 2012 3:10:38 PM PDT
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: UTC Interview for Earl and Andrew

Dear Ladies,

How does a billionaire like you keep yourself grounded and stay in touch with friends?

I mostly stay grounded due to gravity. Except for when I fly my helicopter or F-16. As for the second part of your question, I am not sure how to answer that because I don’t have any friends. This just got awkward, didn’t it? Sorry.

Tell us what you think of the author Andrew Shaffer aka Fanny Merkin. Did he do well to match you up with Anna Steal?!

You’re referring to the book, “Fifty Shames of Earl Grey,” that’s supposedly told from Anna’s perspective? The only person he talked to was my old butler, Data, so I’m guessing the book is filled with lies and half-truths. Or half-lies? Something like that. Mr. Shaffer sent me a copy, but I haven’t had time to read it. I’ve been too busy having sex with my new wife on a giant bed of money.

How did you know Anna was THE one? Did you ever think, with your lifestyle you would ever settle down?

Believe it or not, I knew that Anna was “the one” when she didn’t fall 1500 feet to her death out of my helicopter. You’d be surprised how many times that happened to me with previous relationships! I suppose I should install seatbelts, but I like to live dangerously.

How would you say your relationship with Anna has changed now that she had accepted your lifestyle of BDSM (Bards, Dragons, Sorcery and Magick)?

Anna’s really taken to live-action role playing. I don’t want to say too much about our private life—what happens in the Room of Doom stays in the Room of Doom. Except pregnancies. And STDs.

Do you and Anna like to watch movies? Have you heard of Twilight books/movies?! Tell us what you think of that vampire Edward and his wife Bella?

Of course I’ve heard of the “Twilight” books and movies! I’m solidly Team Jacob, though. I’ve only read the first three books, and didn’t know that Edward and Bella end up getting married. So, thanks for totally ruining that for me. 🙁

Do you think you’ll be watching the highly anticipated Fifty Shades movie when it comes to the big screen or would you rather watch Tom Cruise’s Jack Reacher- new movie in December?

I’m not heard of this “Fifty Shades” movie. Is that based on the autobiography of El James, the Mexican Lucha Libre wrestler, or am I thinking of a different book? As for the Tom Cruise movie, of *course* I’m excited. I’ve had a hard-on ever since I heard he was cast as Jack Reacher. Actually, I should probably get that checked out by a doctor. It’s kind of painful.

Tell us what you think about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. How is this affecting your obsession with him? He turns 50 this year right?

I’ll tell you what this means: Tom Cruise is back on the market! If I were a single lady right now, I would be jumping up and down on my couch. But of course I’m not single, and I’m not a lady. And I would *never* jump on the couch in my condo’s living room, because it’s real faux pleather.

Laters babies,

Earl Grey
[email protected]

Fifty Shames of Earl Grey

A shrewd, laugh–out–loud parody of E. L. James’ bestselling Fifty Shades of Grey series:

Young, arrogant, tycoon Earl Grey seduces the naïve coed Anna Steal with his overpowering good looks and staggering amounts of money, but will she be able to get past his fifty shames, including shopping at Walmart on Saturdays, bondage with handcuffs, and his love of BDSM (Bards, Dragons, Sorcery, and Magick)? Or will his dark secrets and constant smirking drive her over the edge?

Available Now: Amazon

About Andrew
Harper Perennial published Shaffer’s debut nonfiction book, Great Philosophers Who Failed at Love, in 2011. Da Capo Press and Tantor Audio will publish his parody novel, Fifty Shames of Earl Grey, under the pen name “Fanny Merkin” this summer.

His writing has appeared in such diverse publications as Mental Floss and Maxim. He reviews romance, erotica, and women’s fiction for RT Book Reviews magazine.

Shaffer attended the Iowa Writers’ Workshop for a summer semester and studied comedy writing at Chicago’s The Second City. He is also the creative director of Order of St. Nick, the greeting card company whose irreverent cards have been featured on The Colbert Report, NPR, and FOX News.
An Iowa native, Shaffer currently lives in Lexington, Kentucky, a magical land of horses, basketball, and bourbon. You can find him most days causing trouble on Twitter at @andrewtshaffer, @evilwylie, and/or @emperorfranzen.


We have a print copy of FIFTY SHAMES OF EARL GREY up for grabs for one lucky US/Canada maiden!

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  1. Love the part about working in a library and claiming to have IBS. That is one excuse your boss really can’t dispute. Boy, I’d be in trouble if I worked in a library or bookstore. I’m sure I’d lose my job!

    Planning to read Fifty Shades but haven’t yet. My mother has the books, and said she’d loan them to me but that just creeps me out. Think I’ll buy them on my nook and not tell her.

    Thanks for the peak at Andrew and his sense of humor.

    Heather E
    [email protected]

  2. LOL this books sounds hilarious! I would love to win it and read it on the train ride to work each day! LOL I would probably be laughing so loud on the train people wo0uld wonder WTF LOL.

    Thankd for this giveaway!


    Ollie aka DarkBloodyVamp

  3. I have seen this book around the web and I think it sounds great. Thanks for the giveaway. I look forward to your parody of The Original Sinners. That’s the next book on my Kindle! jepebATverizonDOTnet

  4. I was hesitant to read this book because I am one of those people who enjoyed 50 shades. But this interview has changed my mind. Mr. Shaffer seems to have a great sense of humor. Thanks for bringing that to my attention!

  5. This guy is great, Mr Grey’s interview made me giggle. I have seen this book everywhere lately and cannot wait to read it. thx

    blinkysthebest at aol dot com

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